ChadFucksYourOneitis
Seeking immortality
- Joined
- Apr 2, 2020
- Posts
- 5,155
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I just turned 28 and it's just a reminder of what an ugly loser I am and always have been. I was always picked on by girls in high school because of my looks, and it left me feeling cynical and distrustful of most girls. In high school I formed a bunch of crushes on girls I liked, but I never tried to talk to them because I knew they'd only like me if I was a pretty boy. So naturally I'm a virgin, which at this age is downright pathetic. I've never experienced any sort of intimacy with girl, I've never even been kissed before. I get so lonely sometimes and just want physical affection more so than even sex. But I'm aware of how completely undesirable I am, and I don't have the stomach to stand being rejected over and over.
I live in community housing for people with mental illness. I'm constantly around people and I just want to disappear because of what a pathetic loser I am, I don't want to world to know what a loser I am. Nobody where I live likes me, even when I try to spark conversation, and having a loving parents and sister is the only thing I have in my life. I literally have nothing else going for me. I just hide away because of how ugly I am while wishing day to day that I could just have a different face and be a confident person.
I haven't done anything with my life. I wanted to be good looking and cool and go to parties and get laid. Instead I've been suffering since I graduated high school and barely getting through each day. And there's nothing I can do about the way I look. A change of hair style has made little difference, and I can't afford surgery. I'm completely stuck with this pathetic life I've been given. I just can't see any way to change things so that I'm not an old loser.
I'm a 28 year old ugly, virgin, loser : depression (reddit.com)
And this might be me in the next 8 years.