Simple, actionable change we can all make

[Djaniw]

Alright friends and enemies, I see a lot of posts and advice on here on the topic of hyper stimulation, addiction, lifestyle changes etc.

To be clear, I don't actually disagree with the oft-given advise - if you can, absolutely cut down or eliminate porn, dopamine hits from drugs / alcohol, poor quality food, sodas, whatever it is.

But we are all lazy and degenerate bastards here, and so few of us are actually going to do that. We all want the easiest, least effort path of minimal resistance.

So here is my advice that none of you will actually take: set a pre-defined time limit for all these things. Before you start pulling the goalie, impose a strict time limit on the activity and then fucking stick to it. Ideally you want this to be a bank robbery: get in, take what you need and get the fuck out.

How often do you find yourself with 30 tabs open, looking for the ideal video or the exact thing you want? Greater than 1, ever? Then give this method a go and see if it improves anything.

Want to wank? Fine, you've got ten minutes, make them count. Don't train your penis to resist stimulation for 3 hours. Want junk food? Eat what you can in ten minutes, then get back to your diet. Absolutely need your fix of My Little Pony? 15 minutes it is.

Just keep the time fairly low (aim for under 30 minutes as a totally arbitrary, but doable amount) and above all stick to it. Haven't cum despite it being 10 minutes? Tough shit buttercup, better wanking next time. Build up some self control and try again next time your resolve fails - but again stick to your time limit.

Give it a go and see what the empiricism says.

Happy ascending brothers.

 

[defaya]

That’s a high quality post you got there OP

it would be a shame if I did not read a single word

 

[Djaniw]

Fair enough.

I'm never actually sure if people really want advice here, or if they prefer just to vent and bitch. I thought I'd post on the off chance that it would help anyone.

 

[Need2Ascend]

Good post, I've been setting time limits with most scheduled things and must say that it's one of the best strategies for balancing life because at the end of the day time is always scarce. I believe that scheduling in general is the key for sustaining longterm progress instead of falling into shortterm gratification, like saying on sunday or whatever is your cheatday(so 1x/week) where you eat some junk food, on the other 6 days you eat clean, so it's even more enjoyable when you eat that shit food that one time each week, same with all kinds of things

 

[Need2Ascend]

Fair enough.

I'm never actually sure if people really want advice here, or if they prefer just to vent and bitch. I thought I'd post on the off chance that it would help anyone.

Most are lost souls that just rot here tbh

 

[Deleted member 10602]

good shit

 

[Djaniw]

Good post, I've been setting time limits with most scheduled things and must say that it's one of the best strategies for balancing life because at the end of the day time is always scarce. I believe that scheduling in general is the key for sustaining longterm progress instead of falling into shortterm gratification, like saying on sunday or whatever is your cheatday(so 1x/week) where you eat some junk food, on the other 6 days you eat clean, so it's even more enjoyable when you eat that shit food that one time each week, same with all kinds of things

Great to have some independent data that backs the idea up. Also a very good point about the contrast between indulgence and discipline, good to have that here too. I wonder if we could find an optimal ratio (like 1:6 for cheat days vs diet days) for that sort of thing.

 

[Djaniw]

good shit

Thanks brother, hope it's helpful.

 

[Need2Ascend]

Great to have some independent data that backs the idea up. Also a very good point about the contrast between indulgence and discipline, good to have that here too. I wonder if we could find an optimal ratio (like 1:6 for cheat days vs diet days) for that sort of thing.

Yea, I thought about what's optimal too for some time and came to the conclusion through testing and common sense that 1 per week seems to be pretty ideal (not saying that it's not hard to go throught with it but slowly working oneself up to that), so 1x/week a cheatday, 1x/week fapping(as long as you don't have a gf/fwb), 1x/week alcohol, 1x/week lazy/reset day, etc..., I mean those are all things that won't really help you longterm and you need to be conscious about it, but cutting it out completely would be pretty brutal for most and sometimes such copes are needed to keep sanity

 

[Djaniw]

Yea, I thought about what's optimal too for some time and came to the conclusion through testing and common sense that 1 per week seems to be pretty ideal (not saying that it's not hard to go throught with it but slowly working oneself up to that), so 1x/week a cheatday, 1x/week fapping(as long as you don't have a gf/fwb), 1x/week alcohol, 1x/week lazy/reset day, etc..., I mean those are all things that won't really help you longterm and you need to be conscious about it, but cutting it out completely would be pretty brutal for most and sometimes such copes are needed to keep sanity

I think that it could actually help long term in the form you have laid out, as a permanent and predictable pressure release / backup plan that can serve as a default when better options don't work out.

There might be room for periodization here too in the Pavel Tsatsouline strength maxxing sense. It would take more of the testing you mentioned but it might provide a more optimal solution and be worth the time and effort investment.

 

[Deleted member 6939]

Fair enough.

I'm never actually sure if people really want advice here, or if they prefer just to vent and bitch. I thought I'd post on the off chance that it would help anyone.

People who want to do better will
If they want to whine they won't
Seriously don't bother trying to help these people

 

[Littleboy]

Thanks OP. I've always known better time management is key. Problem is being depressed & lethargic about it.

 

[Djaniw]

People who want to do better will
If they want to whine they won't
Seriously don't bother trying to help these people

Absolutely. I like to think that more people will read it and not comment, but maybe give it a go privately.

 

[Djaniw]

Thanks OP. I've always known better time management is key. Problem is being depressed & lethargic about it.

I completely sympathize with the depression and lethargy - that's why I tried to introduce the absolute smallest change that will have the biggest effect. Small, incremental improvements really do add up over time, with little perceived effort.