plukee
Also diagnosed autist alongside orc and clavicular
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2022
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I was having an early sleep only just to realise that the 2 dreams I’ve had are just pure depression-fuel for me
Can’t remember much of dream number 1 but i will tell you that james sapphire was in it again this is now the 11th time james has appeared in my dreams as an entity but he’s usually really harmless or as of recently he has been. For some reason tho he was wearing the clothes I had on today and is a lot more normal in my dreams than he is irl. Can’t remember much of that dream but just wanted to point that out
2nd dream was a BDD & depression dream I remember my college flats actually having a free weights room idk why and just looking at myself in the mirror and my muscle insertions where massive and I swear i had like a 30 inch bidelt and it was fucking insane but i has the worst back acne ever but I didn’t care that much. Then the part that was really upsetting for me was just being more accepting of my looks than i am irl. I was on this holiday with my mum and auntie somewhere really sunny and I remember being at this food chain known for its cookies and coffees and i was so upset when I realised how shit my life is and how unfortunate i was compared to other kids in school growing up as my mum wasn’t financially stable due to fucking stupid decisions she made herself and doesn’t realise it. However my auntie is well off cause she has no kids and her bf is in a high earning job. Yeah it’s fucking over I honestly fucking hate these dreams i have where i have a gf or a better life. I feel like my brain is trying to tell me to end it all but i don’t want to because looksmaxxing gives me a purpose
Can’t remember much of dream number 1 but i will tell you that james sapphire was in it again this is now the 11th time james has appeared in my dreams as an entity but he’s usually really harmless or as of recently he has been. For some reason tho he was wearing the clothes I had on today and is a lot more normal in my dreams than he is irl. Can’t remember much of that dream but just wanted to point that out
2nd dream was a BDD & depression dream I remember my college flats actually having a free weights room idk why and just looking at myself in the mirror and my muscle insertions where massive and I swear i had like a 30 inch bidelt and it was fucking insane but i has the worst back acne ever but I didn’t care that much. Then the part that was really upsetting for me was just being more accepting of my looks than i am irl. I was on this holiday with my mum and auntie somewhere really sunny and I remember being at this food chain known for its cookies and coffees and i was so upset when I realised how shit my life is and how unfortunate i was compared to other kids in school growing up as my mum wasn’t financially stable due to fucking stupid decisions she made herself and doesn’t realise it. However my auntie is well off cause she has no kids and her bf is in a high earning job. Yeah it’s fucking over I honestly fucking hate these dreams i have where i have a gf or a better life. I feel like my brain is trying to tell me to end it all but i don’t want to because looksmaxxing gives me a purpose