MoggerGaston
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Any fellow incels going to Amsterdam Dance Event?
I am going to Awakenings Gashouder on Wednesday night. https://www.awakenings.com/en/events/2022/10/awakenings-opening-night/185750/ If you see an incel there, it's probably me, be sure to say hi I'd love to meet fellow incels. Don't have any other events booked yet, but planning on going 1...
looksmax.org
As preparation yesterday I went to some clothing stores to see if there was some cool rave clothing/acessesories, but there was none of it. So I just went with a standard black t-shirt. Wanted to go in a white dress shirt instead since it would look more cool, but decided to stay lowkey.
Since I ran out of drugs and all my previous dealers seem to have quit/got busted, I still needed to find a new dealer. I joined some random whatsapp groups and eventually found someone that msgd me this:
I needed xtc for sure, but decided to get ketamine too. Turned out to be a choice that would save my night.
Note I don't recommend buying drugs from a random guy like this and not having it tested before use. It was a yolo-move from me.
I took a train to amsterdam and larped to the guy that I live on an adress near the central station. Dealers generally visit your house to sell their wares so you need an adress.
I waited in front of this random house untill the dealer showed up at like 10PM, which ofcourse was an arab badboy in his early 20s. He asked to go inside the house with me, but I told me my parents are home and we have to do the transaction in front of the house
ngl went pretty smooth, guy seemed more stressed out about the whole thing than I was (not the first time I buy from streetdealers).
I bought an mdma purity tester to see if the shit he sold me was real
Trying to do a fucking lab experiment at 11pm in a park in the dark
Shit went horribly wrong, and the test result was also useless. On top of that I cut my finger with my knife while trying to mash a bit of xtc pill into powder.
I think some blood got into the mdma purity test too lol. Fuck that shit.
I stayed calm, relaxed myself and went to drink a cappucino. Had the owner of the bar bring some bandages for me so I wouldn't bleed all over my clothes n shit.
Onto the party. The party started at 10pm already and it was now like 11:30 when I got there. I hid the drugs in my boxers. Usually I'd opt for socks but was kinda paranoid that they would find my 2 packs of gums and figure out I probably have pills somewhere.
But they didn't care. They barely checked for anything.
Inside it was just getting started. Had some cute techno playing
You have this big area in the middle in front of the DJ, and this smaller place where you can climb up with seats where I was sitting.
Decided to take my first drugs at 23:37. SInce I had no clue how strong the xtc was, I decided to play it safe and go light. Taking 1/4th of a pill with the intention to re-evaluate how I feel after 1 hour and potentially take more.
Went up to the dance-floor, hoping it would kick in while im there.
Danced a bit on my own there. But at some point 1 girl was backing up into me so I took the hint and started dancing with her while holding her waist. But she looked around and whiffed me off with a disgusted looking face. Typical foid behavior.
Other people were nicer, you get eye-contact with someone next to you, both smile, make some funny moves, give eachother some compliments for their outfit, etc.
Only issue was it was now approaching the 1 hour mark and I still didn't notice any effects from the xtc
I wasn't vibing that well on the music anymore, and I was doubting the quality of the drugs since they didn't taste much like the XTC ive had previously.
I decided to take half a pill, which should definitely have big results if it's not fake XTC. Then went back to the dance-floor...
The DJs switched and this new one was fucking killing it. going MEGA hard
Holy fuck she got in strong after that last DJ left that didn't really play this hard-techno style.
Anyways this is where the worst part of the night begins. It was now approaching 1:30AM, 2 hours after the first quarter pill, 1 hour after the half pill re-dose. And I still didn't feel ANYTHING. Nothing.
I tried staying calm and figured that I got sold trash with no mdma in it, but atleast I didn't feel bad so I didn't poison myself.
Problem is now I have to go begging for drugs on the dance-floor which is utter shit.
I hate it when people beg me for drugs, so I really didn't want to do this. Terrible vibe. Was feeling down as fuck at this point and decided to head to the 'chill zone'. A small outdoor area where you could smoke and chill.
Honestly was low-key freaking out at this point, getting stressed that I am not gonna have a great evening cuz of failed drugs. Decided to get a drink and sat down.
Met some cool guys there that were doing some other drugs, they asked me what I was on and I said my shit doesnt work. They were all cool n supportive bout it tho, even offered me some of their drugs but it was some weird designer-drugs that I never heard of. Figured it'd wait till other options come.
At this point I took the last quarter xtc pill, cuz why not, might aswell finish it. And then decided to try out the ketamine from the same dealer. But if the xtc was fake, why would the guy sell me real ketamine right?
Well it looked like ketamine atleast. Might aswell try.
So I took the quarter xtc-pill and snorted 2 heaps of ketamine from my bicycle key.
YES.
The ketamine was working. Within 5 minutes I could feel the drowziness and lack of feeling in my arms and legs. The dissassociation that is all too well associated with ketamine.
Some guys helped me not fall down while I climbed back down that plateau again to the dance-floor.
This wasn't too bad tbh. I wasn't feeling energetic or euphoric, but all the stress was gone and I felt mellow.
Some guy came up to me and started talking, he gave me these weird diffraction glasses that makes light look really weird when you look through it. Talked to him a bit, he was here with his girlfriend who was also on xtc. While he was on 3MMC.
Ngl it's hard to talk coherently when you are on ketamine. But for some reason I do like to socialize while on it.
I started conversation with a naked cowboy on the dance-floor. He had a cowboy-hat and pants, but no shirt on. Very chill guy lend me his cowboy hat and taught me a new dance move:
Basically swinging around your arm like this except without rope
That's what he loved doing. He told me he's grabbing all the cowgirls with this move and I should try it too.Slayer-move
At this point the drowziness of the ketamine was wearing off, but I was dancing a lot. My body just wanted to move. I still didn't feel good or have a lot of energy. Just a very nervous body constantly moving. Is it the music? Or is the xtc finally starting to kick in after 2.5 hours since the first dose? JFL.
NEW DJ TIME.
You can see my video-taping is getting more erratic because I am moving and dancing while filming.
This new DJ was fucking amazing (although maybe it was just the drugs clouding my judgement but whatever). At this point I was certain that the xtc started working.
Somehow the ketamine helped it kick in by relaxing me? MDMA is such a fucking weird drug tbh, I am always one of the last guys it kicks in for when I do it with friends too, but this was just a bs time-line.
Dancing because my body wanted to move, slowly turned into enjoying the dancing. Perhaps the red lights and new DJ helped too and it was more my vibe afterall.
Gradually I started feeling something. Before that I felt quite empty and cold inside, just moving a lot. But my mind was becoming happy as I felt the xtc kick-in, and in my mind I was telling myself it all turned out well in the end. I shouldn't be so fucking hard on myself. It's time to enjoy the night.
Within 5-10 minutes, the euphoria waves started blasting my brain. Intense love for myself, the world, the people around me.
I started dissecting the blackpill in my mind and realized it must be total bullshit. People pure love, the world is a fun place. I just need to seek out the right places, people. People in a place like this. And that's how I can bring fun back in my depressed trash life.
Not gonna lie, I did really want to make out and hug girls around me, although I felt good on my own too.
1 girl approached me and complimented my long-hair. We spoke a bit about the drugs she used (xtc, same pills I had) and that she didn't feel much yet. Her friend she was with was going hard and was making out with some other guy in front of us lol.
She was from Brittain and very ugly though
This pheno but slightly younger and not obese but just fat.
In my mind I was weighting the options. Kissing her would probably feel good anyways cuz of the drugs, but I don't want to deal with any of the shit that could come with that like her following me around.
Ended up not initiating, despite her clearly wanting to. Doesn't matter, nice girl though.
Then another girl approached me. This time a low-tier becky Asian girl. Also complimented my hair: (Long hair pill)
We danced a bit, but it never lead anywhere and I was in doubt whether I even wanted it to go anywhere with that girl either.
Euphoria was intense for about 90mins, danced fucking hard. Then I felt it coming down. I took another half xtc pill, figuring this shit was weak stuff and takes long to kick-in. So I just have to up the dosage compared to xtc pills I normally use. This was at 3:30AM or so.
Not really sure how much it did, but I was still feeling really good up untill 4:15AM but not the extreme euphoria I had earlier. So I took another half pill. And then 45 minutes later another half pill.
Tbh this was probably a big mistake in hindsight. Trying to chase that first euphoria wave when the first pill kicks in. You CANNOT reach it anymore by redosing more and harder. It's pointless and one of the major negatives from XTC. When it starts wearing out you become anxious that 'the party is over soon'.
I was still feeling really good though, with a lot of energy and decent vibes. Just not the intense loving euphoria from before. Trying to chase that high like a junk smh.
Insanely good music too.
Some other shit that happened during this time:
Some girl came up to me and laughed+said something that I couldn't understand. But walked away straight after. No idea.
Shitchatted with some guys at the toilet where I drank like 2Litres of water since I barely drank all night and was dancing like crazy.
At this point it was approaching 5:30AM. The XTC mostly ran out in effect, was getting kinda tired, so I went back up to the stage in the back. Where I decided to snort 2 massive heaps of ketamine from my key. I also figured fuck it and took another half pill of xtc.
Best. Decision. Ever.
As I sat there in the back enjoying the lights and the music, I started descending into the K-hole.
This explains it perfectly. I started floating around in a different dimension and everything felt AMAZING. Similar euphoria I had earlier on the night, but perhaps even better.
I had issues moving my legs and arms at all, but I was still moving to the beat. After a while I was able to get up and started standing on the bench I was sitting for, so that now I was the highest person in the entire room. Looking over everyone and everything.
Honestly have no clue how I didn't fall of this bench at all during this time.
This shit was fucking insane. I didn't really feel like I was in my body anymore or at this venue. But just floating through the air and seeing+experience the most beautiful shit.
My body was moving hard aswell, making swimmer moves, karate moves, everything. Non-stop movement. I wouldn't be suprised if they make an after-movie of this event that you'll see me featured somewhere lol.
Pure euphoria while floating through different dimensions. All untill the end ~8AM.
TL: DR
Best night of my life. I love myself for being able to make me feel like this and arrange everything on my own, going raving on my own. I can rely on myself to make me feel good.
XTC+Ketamine = insane combo.
@Latebloomer10 @Winnetou @badg96 @Nameless_Sunflower @ShowerMaxxing @Xangsane @StreegeReturn @DoctorLooksmax @Danish_Retard @AlexBrown84 @the BULL @TsarTsar444
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