ReadBooksEveryday
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AITAH for not looking for an arranged marriage for my daughter after she had an interracial child out of wedlock?
My daughter growing up was exceptionally bright, all GT and AP classes, went to a top Public University. While she was in school she gets into this relationship with this guy call him John.
Initially she tells us John also went to the same school as her but we later discover that was a lie. And in reality he worked random jobs. In her junior year she ends up getting pregnant by him we beg her to abort the baby. She ends up leaving that semester and we end up helping her raise our grandson. John says he is going to Miami and disappears. My daughter moved back in with us and we raised our grandson while she finished her degree online.This whole process we all have gotten close again and we love our grandson. About 1 year and 4 months ago she moved out to her own apartment near by and got a job as well.
She has been dating and meeting guys on her own now and hasn’t had much luck. She now has been asking me and my wife to introduce her to guys through the Indian community with good jobs that are looking to settle down.
.The fact that she already has a kid and the fact that the kid is half black and the fact she was never married either makes it so much worse. Me asking around just brings more drama to our family and harms our social relationships. Daughter doesn’t see this way she sees it as another form of punishment from us. From what I can tell she doesn’t like the work and effort of being a single parent and thinks her only way of improving her work life balance is finding a man to help split the effort. We have tried to tell her softly that she should stick to Americanized dating as we don’t think she would have a lot of luck.
However, she kept pressing us to help her find a guy. The reality is that having children out of wedlock is not part of Indian culture at all, and two the fact that her son is half black will also make it impossible to find a match. She has pressed us to try despite that. But there are two things, 1. Not one person has expressed interest in our daughter, at weddings, prayers no one has approached us to ask us if our daughter was open to meeting their son. 2. I feel that us asking around will make our family look worse if anything and damage our relationships with people in the community.My wife and I have had tense discussions with our daughter, and she views us bad guys.
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