Apparently I don't display emotion (over for my?)

[MoggerGaston]

I already knew I looked intimidating, been told that many times.
Also get told I look like a fuckboy/player, and someone who gets into fights a lot.
Been told I look like the villain from a movie, a danger, evil person.
I get told I should 'smile more' regularly.

Today however it has come to a new low-point in my life.

I had an hour long conversation with my boss about my performance in the company this last year. Every employee has this conversation once a year, and you just go over things that went well or went wrong, Things management has noticed, etc. Improvements, etc.

95% of the conversation was entirely irrelevant. I am doing well in terms of technical skills, I am never late, blah blah blah. Don't worry, I am not about to get fired.

But then this BOMB got dropped:

My supervisor told me that I don't display much emotion during my job to customers, nor to colleagues.

??? legit was fucking surprised as fuck. I always feel like I put aneffort into looking friendly to colleagues, customers, etc. Smiling, trying to 'feel with them' as I help them with their order/delivery/repair.

I was stunned.

Then my supervisor was like wtf? U don't know this about yourself? Nobody ever told you? You seem like the kind of person that simply 'is like that' so I figured this wouldn't be a surprise to you.

?????

Then she said the biggest thing: 'You often seem like a machine, just going through the motions, with no emotional involvement.'

Pure blackpill was going through my brain at this point. I was zoning out of the situation at this point, as it was getting extremely confronting. Legit wondering whether I am somehow an autistic retard and I don't even know it. Whether it's fucking over for my autistic retard brain and if I shouldn't just kill myself since I will never be a normal human being that can enjoy life.

Then she told me: 'Even now during this conversation with you, you don't display emotions. Your face is blank and I have no idea what you are feeling.'

Honestly, it's so fucking over for me.

Am I an autistic retard with no emotions?


Fuck man.

Maybe I am taking this roastie's rant too seriously honestly. Since I've never heard a BRUTAL ATTACK on my brain-chemistry like this before.


Maybe her telling me my face looks 'unemotional' is just the typical racism/discrimination/lookism that I normally get where people tell me my face looks 'intimidating'. And she just worded it differently.

I can't get it out of my mind now though, that maybe I am retarded who thinks he is somewhat normal, when actually I am in a mental asylum and people PRETEND that I am normal.

 

[Deleted member 33826]

Your low trust eyes makes u perfect for becoming a gang member. You wont fit in, in this high trust soy society. Become a menace

 

[MoggerGaston]

Mad as fuck right now and honestly about to quit this job now.
I feel fucking betrayed, discriminated because of my looks again.

I didn't fucking decide to look like some autistic villain now did I? So now I am going to get attacked time and time again for a perceived personality/brain flaw that isn't there?

I hate human life so fucking much. Fuck socializing or talking to people at all. I will stick to this forum for that.

I don't feel unemotional at all, I just don't display the emotions they want me to display when they want it from me.

Why would I sperg out emotionally during a conversation like this, even though I feel like killing myself when I hear that people see me as a fucking robot? There's no use, I remain cold and calculated to get it to a good end.

fuck this gay life

 

[ghostman]

i think they need to fill the conversation somehow so they pick something like that, when they are otherwise happy and don't know what to say. usually it fits slightly autistic .org users like ourselves....

 

[MoggerGaston]

Your low trust eyes makes u perfect for becoming a gang member. You wont fit in, in this high trust soy society. Become a menace

i will never fit in

 

[MoggerGaston]

i think they need to fill the conversation somehow so they pick something like that, when they are otherwise happy and don't know what to say. usually it fits slightly autistic .org users like ourselves....

if i have slight autism then its over?

will i ever have friends or a girlfriend in my life ever?

i shouldve been euthanized

 

[Sprinkles]

Haha I get that shit all the time

the look on normies faces is priceless tho,

I love scaring those motherfuckers with my non NTness,

 

[Clown Show]

What can I say, it's brutal...

But anyway, that was very rude of that bitch and it is actually a personal insult.

 

[SoundnVision]

Yeh you're probably an autist I mean you're on here like all of us why didn't you figure it out by now

 

[kwacker777]

Dick down your supervisor boyo. Only way

 

[Deleted member 7580]

Everyone posting heres autistic

I’ve was aksed by a girl I was hanging out with if I’m autistic bcz apparently I couldn’t understand her sarcasm or read her micro expressions

Who cares lol

 

[XtrovertNTnormalfag]

My opinion on this issue is that it is somehow normal for Northern Europeans to appear somehow robotic and without expressions, so nothing that would make you stand out or that you should be worried about.
If you lived in Southern Europe or some ethnikkk country you would be fucked up, that's true.

 

[MoggerGaston]

Haha I get that shit all the time

the look on normies faces is priceless tho,

I love scaring those motherfuckers with my non NTness,

Relatable.

I can act extremely cold-blooded in emotional/stressfull situations.

But I know it's a coping mechanism from me in the inside? Like I can FEEL all the emotions inside of me, but I choose to display none of them and remain 'rational'. I feel the huge emotional burden, but I try to largely ignore it.

I don't feel like an unemotional robot, but I act like one.

 

[Manletmachine]

i get told I look depressed all the time

 

[MoggerGaston]

What can I say, it's brutal...

But anyway, that was very rude of that bitch and it is actually a personal insult.

She was extremely apologetic just before she dropped that bomb and during it. Non-stop she was saying: 'yeah you act unemotional but it doesn't really matter' 'yeah I gave you an 'barely sufficient score' here, but you have to know it doesn't really matter. 'I understand if you don't care much about this job, don't worry about it'. "You are just working part-time here, you act unemotional but you dont have to be perfect'.

that type of vibe. I know I am completely safe. In terms of this job,
the conclusion was: 'We love you as an employee and we want to keep you as long as possible.'

I gave some own rants of my own of some appalling job circumstances which she was going to look after. The job isn't on the line here.

I have this 100% certain in my mind.

I am just thinking about what her observations mean for me, in my personal life. Am I some type of autistic robot in my normal life? wtf

 

[MoggerGaston]

Yeh you're probably an autist I mean you're on here like all of us why didn't you figure it out by now

I study physics at the highest possible level.(Theoretical) Only autists would ever even do that.

That's probably a better indicator than being on this forum.

 

[Sprinkles]

She was extremely apologetic just before she dropped that bomb and during it. Non-stop she was saying: 'yeah you act unemotional but it doesn't really matter' 'yeah I gave you an 'barely sufficient score' here, but you have to know it doesn't really matter. 'I understand if you don't care much about this job, don't worry about it'. "You are just working part-time here, you act unemotional but you dont have to be perfect'.

that type of vibe. I know I am completely safe. In terms of this job,
the conclusion was: 'We love you as an employee and we want to keep you as long as possible.'

I gave some own rants of my own of some appalling job circumstances which she was going to look after. The job isn't on the line here.

I have this 100% certain in my mind.

I am just thinking about what her observations mean for me, in my personal life. Am I some type of autistic robot in my normal life? wtf

what job u work

 

[MoggerGaston]

Dick down your supervisor boyo. Only way

I would, she's decent-looking. But I don't vibe with her at all.

 

[Sprinkles]

I study physics at the highest possible level.(Theoretical) Only autists would ever even do that.

That's probably a better indicator than being on this forum.

bro thinks he‘s Oppenheimer

 

[MoggerGaston]

what job u work

I avoid being doxxed, thanks.

 

[Sprinkles]

I avoid being doxxed, thanks.

are you good at math? you must be high IQ

 

[MoggerGaston]

bro thinks he‘s Oppenheimer

I would've been Oppenheimer if I was born into a rich privileged jewish family like him and gotten the support I needed.

I have the highIQ creative brain-chemistry like he does. Just lacked the environmental circumstances to develop it properly.

And ofcourse, beyond that, you also still need a lot of other luck to run out as a 'prodigy'.

 

[Allornothing]

Face is more important than personality. If you don’t look like a cuck no one will see you that way. Jfl at npcs and their “emotional involvement” with work. How can they even find most jobs remotely interesting?

 

[MoggerGaston]

are you good at math? you must be high IQ

I was always top of my class in math, and always scored top 1% in national math tests in the netherlands for my age.

In that comparison, I was 'good' at maths. But I am bad at maths compared to actual mathematicians at a university level.

Maths was always just a tool to me for other things. I always lacked fundamental interest in mathematical concepts.

 

[MoggerGaston]

i get told I look depressed all the time

All the time? damn.

I try to hide it as much as possible, but I get told this too still, but rarely.

 

[MoggerGaston]

Everyone posting heres autistic

I’ve was aksed by a girl I was hanging out with if I’m autistic bcz apparently I couldn’t understand her sarcasm or read her micro expressions

Who cares lol

I honestly think my lack of emotional involvement is due to PTSD/Trauma/Depression, not because of autism.

 

[Manletmachine]

I avoid being doxxed, thanks.

Blud posts his face all over the forum and says he’s worried about getting doxxed

 

[MoggerGaston]

My opinion on this issue is that it is somehow normal for Northern Europeans to appear somehow robotic and without expressions, so nothing that would make you stand out or that you should be worried about.
If you lived in Southern Europe or some ethnikkk country you would be fucked up, that's true.

if I grew up in southern europe, I would've never ended up 'autistic' in the first place though.

 

[MoggerGaston]

Blud posts his face all over the forum and says he’s worried about getting doxxed

I have no social-media. I have zero, online-presence.
I have no friends, family, girlfriend, nothing.
You would literally have to find me IRL and compare my IRL face to my looksmax posts to dox me.

But I am increasingly getting worried about how anonymous I really am. The era of the internet being an anonymous place is ending.

 

[MoggerGaston]

Face is more important than personality. If you don’t look like a cuck no one will see you that way. Jfl at npcs and their “emotional involvement” with work. How can they even find most jobs remotely interesting?

The 'top dogs' at this company seem to be people that fake emotions really well.

Like some of the major manager/supervisors at this job, act extremely 'interested, intrigued, kind, warm-hearted' to me. The way they do it, isn't creepy at all. They genuinely seem like 'nice, good, warm, empathic people'.

But it all just seems so incredibly fucking fake to me. I never see these people outside of work, I mean nothing to them, the interaction between us is as superficial as can be. Just because you 'act right' doesn't mean our relationship holds any real value.

but apparently this does persuade lowIQ NT Normies. They are convinced this person 'is the right person'.



Meanwhile, I see right through their fake smiles, their fake gestures, their fake interest. I can literally see them looking at me, judging my vibe, and taking on a different persona that fits the situation. I can see right through all of it.

Perhaps my only problem in life is not being a total psychopath like them and faking emotions/interest even better than I already do.

 

[Clown Show]

I am just thinking about what her observations mean for me, in my personal life. Am I some type of autistic robot in my normal life? wtf

Probably blackpill and life in general has taken a toll on you.

Go spend some time in nature.

 

[Vermilioncore]

I just stare and drool all day and ignore everyone

 

[MoggerGaston]

Probably blackpill and life in general has taken a toll on you.

Go spend some time in nature.

So you propose to avoid socialization as much as possible and quit my job? I don't get it.

 

[MoggerGaston]

I just stare and drool all day and ignore everyone

based

 

[Bojack]

I don't even get anything from ppl dude. It's ogre tier.

 

[Clown Show]

So you propose to avoid socialization as much as possible and quit my job? I don't get it.

Nah, just to go in nature on weekends and when you have free time.

You can go alone or better with someone. It will surely improve your mood.

 

[MoggerGaston]

I don't even get anything from ppl dude. It's ogre tier.

neither do i.

I literally go to raves on drugs and not talk to a single person at all during a 10hour long night-session.

 

[MoggerGaston]

Nah, just to go in nature on weekends and when you have free time.

You can go alone or better with someone. It will surely improve your mood.

i dont know if itll improve my mood.

Largely I find, the more I avoid socializing, the better my mood.

 

[longjohnmong]

Am I an autistic retard with no emotions?

Yes. This is what I've been trying to tell you.

 

[MoggerGaston]

Yes. This is what I've been trying to tell you.

All this time, I thought I was a normal human being

but it was all pretend

Drove around africa with these people, while I was an autistic subhuman. Over for me.

 

[einzigartig]

I already knew I looked intimidating, been told that many times.
Also get told I look like a fuckboy/player, and someone who gets into fights a lot.
Been told I look like the villain from a movie, a danger, evil person.
I get told I should 'smile more' regularly.

Today however it has come to a new low-point in my life.

I had an hour long conversation with my boss about my performance in the company this last year. Every employee has this conversation once a year, and you just go over things that went well or went wrong, Things management has noticed, etc. Improvements, etc.

95% of the conversation was entirely irrelevant. I am doing well in terms of technical skills, I am never late, blah blah blah. Don't worry, I am not about to get fired.

But then this BOMB got dropped:

My supervisor told me that I don't display much emotion during my job to customers, nor to colleagues.

??? legit was fucking surprised as fuck. I always feel like I put aneffort into looking friendly to colleagues, customers, etc. Smiling, trying to 'feel with them' as I help them with their order/delivery/repair.

I was stunned.

Then my supervisor was like wtf? U don't know this about yourself? Nobody ever told you? You seem like the kind of person that simply 'is like that' so I figured this wouldn't be a surprise to you.

?????

Then she said the biggest thing: 'You often seem like a machine, just going through the motions, with no emotional involvement.'

Pure blackpill was going through my brain at this point. I was zoning out of the situation at this point, as it was getting extremely confronting. Legit wondering whether I am somehow an autistic retard and I don't even know it. Whether it's fucking over for my autistic retard brain and if I shouldn't just kill myself since I will never be a normal human being that can enjoy life.

Then she told me: 'Even now during this conversation with you, you don't display emotions. Your face is blank and I have no idea what you are feeling.'

Honestly, it's so fucking over for me.

View attachment 2569852

Am I an autistic retard with no emotions?


Fuck man.

Maybe I am taking this roastie's rant too seriously honestly. Since I've never heard a BRUTAL ATTACK on my brain-chemistry like this before.


Maybe her telling me my face looks 'unemotional' is just the typical racism/discrimination/lookism that I normally get where people tell me my face looks 'intimidating'. And she just worded it differently.

I can't get it out of my mind now though, that maybe I am retarded who thinks he is somewhat normal, when actually I am in a mental asylum and people PRETEND that I am normal.

not even kidding u don't look that intimidating normies like to exaggerate tbh

 

[longjohnmong]

All this time, I thought I was a normal human being

but it was all pretend

Drove around africa with these people, while I was an autistic subhuman. Over for me.

Normies harmonize on an emotional level. Their interactions are like a dance. They are not trying to exchange ideas.

Joscha Bach talks about it here, except he calls autists "nerds"

 

[Bojack]

neither do i.

I literally go to raves on drugs and not talk to a single person at all during a 10hour long night-session.

Bro that sucks

 

[longjohnmong]

this is what girls think about your appearance

 

[Deleted member 21661]

I'm the same, though I know I generally come off as monotone and unemotional. The thing is even when I do think I'm being expressive and emotional, I'm not, and just act the same as usual.
Adderall helps though.

 

[itisoverboyos]

I also don’t display emotion

 

[Deleted member 39140]

You’re bored and uninterested and low energy. Be happy and high energy, your life is short DONT be that quiet guy. Good thread. I’m the exact same as you and always been the same quiet low energy depressed guy MY WHOLE LIFE IVE NEVER MOVED UP AND FORWARD EVER! @XtrovertNTnormalfag how to fix?

 

[XtrovertNTnormalfag]

You’re bored and uninterested and low energy. Be happy and high energy, your life is short DONT be that quiet guy. Good thread. I’m the exact same as you and always been the same quiet low energy depressed guy MY WHOLE LIFE IVE NEVER MOVED UP AND FORWARD EVER! @XtrovertNTnormalfag how to fix?

You’re bored and uninterested and low energy. Be happy and high energy, your life is short DONT be that quiet guy. Good thread. I’m the exact same as you and always been the same quiet low energy depressed guy MY WHOLE LIFE IVE NEVER MOVED UP AND FORWARD EVER! @XtrovertNTnormalfag how to fix?

Will reply tomorrow when I sober up bro, now I am at the party. It is friday night. And its black friday party.

 

[_MVP_]

You remind me of the Main Char of American Psycho.

I have the Same "Problem"

 

[SubSigma]

I get told the same shit. Its always you should talk more, you should smile more, you are quiet, are you ok. I would be minding my own business chilling and then someone says some shit like that and its like a normie way of saying you are a non nt freak and you make me uncomfortable cause I can’t properly read you. I took ssris and it actually helped me at my job and I got promoted shortly after. I hot off ssris and my life kinda fell apart. I got back in em and am waiting for them to take effect. Being non nt is as bad as being sub 5 tbh. When I go out on weekends I just use drugs and alcohol to ntmaxx.