How do I tell my date there will be no sex before marriage?

[TB1997]

I have a first date with a girl I met at the gym.
Im afraid I will scare her away if I tell her there will be no sex before marriage because of my faith..

I feel like the smart thing to do is not saying it until I have to. But I would like your advice.

I dont want to fumble the bag this time.

 

[thecel]

Giga hard question.

On one hand, I respect you if you’re serious about abstaining from sex outside of marriage. So few people in this day and age have the willpower to stick to a traditional value like that.

On the other hand, the dating market these days is extremely cutthroat, and your competition doesn’t just go away once you’ve “gotten” a girl. If you don’t fuck her, another man will.

 

[dreamcake1mo]

Your beta. And they will agree with you but think your a absolute retard. And for good reason.

You have to be absolutely clueless to not recognize the state of society and these times we live in. Your beta not because you want to abstain from sex until marrage, but because your actually expecting modern women to hold this belief and keep it.

let alone your idea, you should be more worried on if your women will sit around and not be hypergamous or modern women. Have you been living under a rock?

And on another note, religion is a derivative. Understand what that means. Do yourself a favor and actually learn the books of what religion bases itself on and dissasociate yourself from trying to socialize using those sources as a familiarity. If anything your leaving yourself up for deception.

 

[Gonthar]

I have a first date with a girl I met at the gym.
Im afraid I will scare her away if I tell her there will be no sex before marriage because of my faith..

I feel like the smart thing to do is not saying it until I have to. But I would like your advice.

I dont want to fumble the bag this time.

Don't say anything, it's also very unlikely she will initiate sex(unless you're a Chad). If you start a relationship with her, just drop some hints like: "I'm a traditional guy", "I believe in the sanctity of marriage", etc.

 

[TB1997]

Your beta. And they will agree with you but think your a absolute retard. And for good reason.

You have to be absolutely clueless to not recognize the state of society and these times we live in. Your beta not because you want to abstain from sex until marrage, but because your actually expecting modern women to hold this belief and keep it.

And on another note, religion is a derivative. Understand what that means. Do yourself a favor and actually learn the books of what religion bases itself on and dissasociate yourself from trying to socialize using those sources as a familiarity. If anything your leaving yourself up for deception.

1) Please explain how it is beta to expect women to hold this belief. Expecting women to stay pure until marriage is the least beta/cucked thing you could do.

2) The New Testament is based on over 2000 manuscripts and there are many non-Christian first-hand sources writing about Christ and his followers. The gospel literally changed the world and there is such a huge rational/apologetics foundation for believing in the gospel.

 

[autistic_tendencies]

Tell her an impotent loser who can’t make a girl cum
Hahaha

 

[TB1997]

Don't say anything, it's also very unlikely she will initiate sex(unless you're a Chad). If you start a relationship with her, just drop some hints like: "I'm a traditional guy", "I believe in the sanctity of marriage", etc.

Great idea.
Maybe I don't have to make it a huge announcement. I could just make hints and refer to the value as a somewhat common value etc.

 

[TB1997]

If you don’t fuck her, another man will.

Trust me, this one is different bro

 

[thecel]

1) Please explain how it is beta to expect women to hold this belief. Expecting women to stay pure until marriage is the least beta/cucked thing you could do.

It’s cucked because it’s wishful thinking. You hold onto an idealistic belief that won’t play out in practice. Female purity has never been lower; female promiscuity has never been higher. The chances of you finding a woman who’ll stick to the same belief are basically nil.

 

[Xangsane]

tell her upfront, that's what I did with my fiancee

 

[Xangsane]

I have a first date with a girl I met at the gym.
Im afraid I will scare her away if I tell her there will be no sex before marriage because of my faith..

I feel like the smart thing to do is not saying it until I have to. But I would like your advice.

I dont want to fumble the bag this time.

muslim?

 

[TB1997]

tell her upfront, that's what I did with my fiancee

Based. How did she react?

muslim?

Christian.

 

[Xangsane]

Based. How did she react?


Christian.

Ah that makes sense.
She was looking for the same thing!! So it all worked out

 

[Xangsane]

Based. How did she react?


Christian.

Ah that makes sense.
She was looking for the same thing!! So it all worked out

however I did lose my virginity beforehand to a half Indian girl who was quite persistent with me and I was naive, so I repented. my body count is at the moment 1, and my fiancee is aware of this and knows I am repenting

 

[TB1997]

however I did lose my virginity beforehand to a half Indian girl who was quite persistent with me and I was naive, so I repented. my body count is at the moment 1, and my fiancee is aware of this and knows I am repenting

Great to hear that, mate.

I even had pre-martial sex once after I was baptized. Very bad stuff, but I want to get better and repent.
It has been a struggle to find a girl who holds the same beliefs as me. This would ofc be the ideal situation.

Are you also a Christian?

 

[Xangsane]

Great to hear that, mate.

thank you so much

I even had pre-martial sex once after I was baptized. Very bad stuff, but I want to get better and repent.
It has been a struggle to find a girl who holds the same beliefs as me. This would ofc be the ideal situation.

it is hard to resist temptation but I did it. especially in today's day and age.

Are you also a Christian?

I'm a muslim!

 

[robtical]

Marry early/fast?

 

[TB1997]

Marry early/fast?

Ideally. But this is far from normal today...

 

[robtical]

Ideally. But this is far from normal today...

So is what you are expecting "no sex before marriage". Your best option is to marry fast, study/work/whatever together. But ofc you will need family permission most probably. If you really want to make it happen, you will go through it. Otherwise keep coping with other methods which will probably fail

 

[dreamcake1mo]

1) Please explain how it is beta to expect women to hold this belief. Expecting women to stay pure until marriage is the least beta/cucked thing you could do.

2) The New Testament is based on over 2000 manuscripts and there are many non-Christian first-hand sources writing about Christ and his followers. The gospel literally changed the world and there is such a huge rational/apologetics foundation for believing in the gospel.

Read @thecel comment.

Its wishful thinking and is not logical at all in practice. Your chances of finding a pure women, let alone a women who is abstaining just for you is so crazily low, and if your in a western country forget about it.

Your priming yourself up, to a almost 99% possibility, for cuck situations like; the girl cheating on you, you not knowing the girl is actually extremely promiscuous before meeting you, hypergamy, dead bedrooms, feministic mindgames, and just flat out wasting your damn time.

Its actually crazy how i have to explain this to you. You need some common sense. Im also surprised that you can sit down and say old testament/new testament, yet blatantly forget that the bible has entire prophecies and statistical ideas that explains women and modern day behavior. Your clearly lacking information and thats why i told you to sit the hell down and read some more. Absolutely ridiculous. And before you spew some more religious bullshit, know that i have an entire website dedicated to researching biblical scripture, from the old testament pseudepigrapha, to the new testament, to the first book of adam and eve. I can tell you right now that you are simply chasing a unicorn. Those books are more than religion. Yea its good to groom women to you, but your missing a lot of context that applies to you today right now, that renders doing your magical idea absolutely pointless/painful and a waste of time. Use your damn common sense and stop the delusion.

 

[TB1997]

Read @thecel comment.

Its wishful thinking and is not logical at all in practice. Your chances of finding a pure women, let alone a women who is abstaining just for you is so crazily low, and if your in a western country forget about it.

Your priming yourself up, to a almost 99% possibility, for cuck situations like; the girl cheating on you, you not knowing the girl is actually extremely promiscuous before meeting you, hypergamy, dead bedrooms, feministic mindgames, and just flat out wasting your damn time looking for a unicorn.

Its actually crazy how i have to explain this to you. You need some common sense. Im also surprised that you can sit down and say old testament/new testament and blatantly forget that the bible has entire prophecies and statistical ideas that explains women and modern day behavior. Your clearly lacking information thats why i told you to sit the hell down and read some more. Absolutely ridiculous.

Ecclesiastes 7:28: "While I was still searching but not finding— I found one upright man among a thousand, but not one upright woman among them all."

I'm very aware of how the bible depicts women as unvirtuous. It's evident from the first book (Eve)...
However - call me naive, bluepilled (and even beta I guess??) - I refuse to give up and settle for a whore.
If I adopt your blackpilled mindset (which I will admit is quite rational) I'm destined for failure.

 

[dreamcake1mo]

Ecclesiastes 7:28: "While I was still searching but not finding— I found one upright man among a thousand, but not one upright woman among them all."

I'm very aware of how the bible depicts women as unvirtuous. It's evident from the first book (Eve)...
However - call me naive, bluepilled (and even beta I guess??) - I refuse to give up and settle for a whore.
If I adopt your blackpilled mindset (which I will admit is quite rational) I'm destined for failure.

While your at it quote the other verses that let you know what stage and point society is in, and count your odds to be even lower.

You are destined for failure. Thats the damn point. You looking for some magical women. Your going to =fail, or waste so much dang time you might as well have failed the purpose in life. Thats the point you need to understand. Im not telling you to sleep with every woman like a ONS. Im also not telling you to settle for a whore. Im simply letting you know about the reality of your current decision. Your better off doing anything else like working on yourself or something, thna to settle down with a women and expect anything other than what me and the others (including the books of your very dang religion), already predicts will happen.

You are very much naive for thinking this goal with very minimal reward/ not worth the struggle, will work out in your favor. Your bluepilled to chase this idea and to think a women will just apply to your traditional role. And that its any different from marrying a modern women who does. This means you lack very basic "information" and context regarding female nature such as hypergamy, preselection, FDS, feminism, chameleon nature and more. Youre quite literally underdeveloped when it comes to such things, including the state of society, your own religion, women etc. That your better off just studying and focusing on your own growth and scrapping the idea of chasing something that statistically is a waste of life.

 

[TB1997]

You are very much naive for thinking a goal with very minimal reward/ not worth the struggle, is a good thing to seek for. Your bluepilled to think a women will just apply to your traditional role, and that its worth marrying a modern women who does, and you lack very basic "redpill" or information and context regarding female nature such as hypergamy, preselection, FDS, feminism, chameleon nature and more. Youre quite literally underdeveloped when it comes to such things.

I'm aware of all this information. However, are you aware that there exist exceptions to the rule?

I'm not going to argue my religious stance on this, as you don't seem to care. However, I will say that this is very much a goal that is worth the struggle: Fornication is one of the most mentioned sins in the New Testament.

 

[Michael Myers]

Surprising to see that OP is a xtian and not a muzzie. Mirin.

 

[dreamcake1mo]

I'm aware of all this information. However, are you aware that there exist exceptions to the rule?

I'm not going to argue my religious stance on this, as you don't seem to care. However, I will say that this is very much a goal that is worth the struggle: Fornication is one of the most mentioned sins in the New Testament.

Did you listen to what i said though? Im not telling you to fornicate. Im not telling you that desiring a pure women is a bad thing, and that you should desire a hoe. Read what we are saying. Were just letting you know the truth about your decision. Accept it. The truth. Delusion is what comes when you ignore factual truths and ignore your way in religion and ordinances without learning a damn about where you exist and how it applies.

They are ways to help your search of such a women, but dude. Your not listening. The facts of what we are saying wont hurt you, in matter of fact if its true, it will literally help you in all ways. Because at least by understanding the subjects we are introducing you about, (including your own delusion, hypergamy, female nature, beta, preselection), you can actually walk a path of becoming less naïve and self growth, so that that chase can be way easier and you can actually more effectively judge a matter.

But your implying that you know all shit, which means your literally walking yourself into a pit of delusion and a waste of damn time.

 

[enchanted_elixir]

I have a first date with a girl I met at the gym.
Im afraid I will scare her away if I tell her there will be no sex before marriage because of my faith..

I feel like the smart thing to do is not saying it until I have to. But I would like your advice.

I dont want to fumble the bag this time.

Tell her immediately. Don't wait.

 

[TB1997]

Tell her immediately. Don't wait.

Don't you think I should wait until it is somewhat relevant?
If I tell her immediately I "imply" that she wants to have sex with me, which might not be the case.

Just my line of thought.

 

[enchanted_elixir]

Don't you think I should wait until it is somewhat relevant?
If I tell her immediately I "imply" that she wants to have sex with me, which might not be the case.

Just my line of thought.

When relevant sure.

 

[Shogun]

Only works if she is religious as well (which 90% of Western foids aren't)