My looks (my new goal)

[DoII]

I wouldn't want to see this state of affairs as depressing. Rather, I think that it is beyond amazing that there is actually a possibility for me to attain a set of looks that I am comfortable with. Regardless of what people would "rate" me, I could finally be free and happy with the knowledge that I like the way that I look.

Countless people have died with far less than I have had in my relatively short lifespan, despite the fact that I have had so little personal love and attraction. If I can die pursuing my dream (well, except for answering Leibniz' great quesiton) one might say that I will die happily. I certainly don't desire death if life seems to have more to offer, and with certain adjustments to my face, I could definitely picture living happily.

You see, I am not entirely bereaved of (impersonal) love. I love writing and playing music, singing, dancing, and more thereto. Though I am an introvert I don't doubt that I would get along perfectly well with you and most other friendly people here. I don't lack friends, never have, and probably never will. Somehow, though, I struggle to make any of this truly matter when I can't get the face that I see in the mirror and photos to congrue with the picture that I paint of myself in my head.

Comparing myself to my parents and grandparents, I have certain traits that none of them had, and I most certainly wonder why I have them at all--if this amounts to subideal development or an unusual genetic recombination (yes, I am absolutely certain that I am a lineal descendant of those people). For example, I have a dorsal hump--none of my grandparents did. I have many other issues --grandparents, oh no. Those traits bother me way more than anything else bar existential angst, since I struggle to make sense of the fact that I have them in the first place. However, I am a poor judge of myself, and hence possibly inclined to over- and underrate certain aspects. Hence, I wanted to receive external input.

This post is poorly composed (can't sleep), but I just wanted somehow to make it all seem less "depressing" and more "well, that's that".

 

[DoII]

Yes I do realise that most people would look at me as though I were from another planet if I told them that I would rather spend, say, $100.000 (don't quote me on that figure, I just made it up) on complex craniofacial surgery to move my eyes a few mm further apart than on a cool, expensive car, a great apartment, or whatever it is that appeals to people in general.

Hell, to be honest, I would rather have my ideal looks--which, again, do not primarily amount to some abstract x/10 but rather a set of proportions that I probabilistically should have inherited in the first place--and a chance to relive my lost youth than all the money in the world.

 

[Sprinkles]

your appearance/body/genes are predetermined by the mantis alien handler you have

you can try DMT if you want to meet it

 

[anthony111553]

didnt real lil nigga

 

[DoII]

your appearance/body/genes are predetermined by the mantis alien handler you have

you can try DMT if you want to meet it

Fake…

 

[DoII]

I'm typing this after a long night of not sleeping at all, so please pardon inconsistencies and ramblings. Just thought that I should share my "backstory" with you lot, in case anyone is interested and/or can relate to my experiences. At the very least, perhaps this could explain to some why I am so adamant about really having this stuff done, although it is grossly atypical, kind of risky, and ludicrously expensive.

 

[Sprinkles]

Fake…

many people who’ve done DMT have encountered them

 

[DoII]

many people who’ve done DMT have encountered them

I’ll look into it

 

[Sprinkles]

I’ll look into it

 

[DoII]

interesting

 

[shabby890]

Dnrd

But good luck

 

[DoII]

:/

 

[DoII]

@FunkyFlamingo

 

[Bzz]

@FunkyFlamingo

Go to sleep nigga

 

[DoII]

V

 

[DoII]

C

 

[DoII]

Yo