Cointoss/Chad/Incel
Iron Enthusiast
- Joined
- May 20, 2023
- Posts
- 156
- Reputation
- 58
If you are a lanklet and are not following this, rope immediately 
1. Why? I have yet to see a good hypertrophy split on this website. Every single one of you is coping beyond belief with your androgens, PCTs and Growth factors that you all forget how to build muscle and mog subhumans naturally without spending thousands on chemical compounds. If you follow this guide to the tee you will be able to mog a volume deepthroating SARMs goblin effortlessly, and you won't have to deal with the cost and the side effects of injecting yourself with Testosterone and GH. Obviously you CAN also be a roidtranny while'st using this guide, if you follow these steps you will mog 90% of this website, and only the genetically frame, bone and muscle blessed roidtrannies on this guide will mog you, the noble natty who made the most with what he was given. Get ready to elevate your body and mind to heights you never thought were conceivable.
2. Pre-Requisites Before you go sign up at a local gym, there are some things you need to be aware about. No doubt about it, the more you involve yourself with hypertrophy and fitness in general in real life, your online activity is going to reflect that as well. Here are some things you should look out for:
Multivitamin daily
Fish Oil Omega 3 daily
Optional ones are: Pre-Workout ( Or buy the ingredients, mainly caffeine (capsules) L-citrulline, L-Arginine and add some sort of flavoing powder), whey protein powder or isolate (isolate tends to be offered in fruitier, juice-like flavors), Dextrose, EAAs (NEVER BUY BCAAs, THEY ARE THE INBRED OBJECTIVELY WORSE SUBHUMAN VARIANT OF EAAs), L-Tryptophan or Melatonin
3. Nutrition
DO NOT EXPECT TO BUILD MUSCLE IF YOU ARE EATING LIKE AN INFANT; YOU MUST BE IN A CALORIC SURPLUS TO GROW; IF YOU ARE 55KGs 'bUt mUh aBs' KILL YOURSELF NOW!!!! Now that I've hooked you dopamine fiends, let us get int the important stuff. Look up a TDEE or maintenance calorie calculator and enter what it asks of you, most likely age, height, gender, weight, activity level, exercise frequency and in some cases body fat percentage. It will caclulate how many calories you need to maintain your current weight. Take that number and add 100-150 calories on top of that. This is how much you wil be eating. Weigh yourself dail and if you see your weight stagnate for a two days or so, increase the surplus. If you want to gain weight faster, your surplus can be larger, 200-300 calories over. Personally never go over 500 calories maximum, because at that point it is most likely mostly fat you are gaining. You should eat unprocessed natural foods, like red meat, poultry, complex carbs like rice and potatoes, eggs, milk, cheese, yogurt, as well as animal fats from butter, ghee, pork fat, beef tallow. Another thing is that you should be almost constantly feeding your body nutrients, I would say three meals minimum per day. Eat before bed as well, so that the body has energy throughout the night. Pre and post workout meals are a good, thing however there's no such thing as an 'anabolic window', so don't force yourself to chug a protein shake immediately after your last intense rep for that workout. A good pre workout meal for example would be oats with protein powder, banana and honey, post workout a quick protein shake or bar and a banana and dates. Your bulk should not be shorter than 6 months, with 1 to 2 and a half years in a CONTROLLED AND CONSISTENT surplus of 100-200 calories, which will prevent you from gaining too much fat. Of course, you can bulk longer if you stay in a controlled and consistent surplus. Don't come back crying about why you look like a fat pig if you ate 2000 calories over for 5 months and don't look like Arnold.
4. Sleep: 8+ hours of restful, comfy snoozing plus good nutrition and diet equals gains. My succesfull protocol to get my sleep schedule back in order is the following: No blue light from screens at least two hours before bed, 500mg of l-Tryptophan 1 hour before bed, making my brain associate my bed with sleeping by not laying in bed during the day, also not reading in bed in the 2 hours without screens. If you are just starting this, put an alarm in the morning and jump out of bed even if you are still tired. After a few days, your body and brain will readjust your farigue and tiredness to the end of the day, because if you are tired when waking up, you'll be more tired when sleeping, thus leading to faster falling asleep and a higher chance of getting 8 hours of quality sleep.
3. Training
Now we are talking. This split can be adjusted based on how much time you have and how many days you want to train
ALL SETS ARE TAKEN TO FAILURE WITH GOOD FORM AND COMPLETE RANGE OF MOTION; SO PICK A WEIGHT WITH WHICH YOU WILL FAIL IN THE GIVEN REP RANGE; 3 MINUTES TIMED REST BETWEEN EACH SET AND EXERCISE MINIMUM!!!!! ALL EXERCISES ARE 2 SETS 5-8 REPS WITH LOADED STRETCH IN THE ECCENTRIC (STRETCHED) POSITIO COUNT TO 30 IN YOUR HEAD BEFORE LETTING THE WEIGHT DOWN SLOWLY!!!!
D1: Back (30-45min)
Wide Grip Lat Pulldown, Double D-Handle Lat Pulldown, Horizontal Neutral Grip Lat Row
T-Bar Row, Horizontal Wide Grip Row, Incline Bench Dumbbell Row
Tips: Let the bar pull your scapula up or forward for a better stretch and full ROM
D2: Chest (15-30mins)
Incline Machine or Dumbbell Press, Flat Horizontal or Vertical Press, Pec Deck
Tips: Squeeze your scapula together, keep your arms close to your torso at a 30 degree angle on pressing movements, don't arch your back on incline, humeral arm path on presses should have a large curve away from the torso on the eccentric incline angle of 30 degrees for incline press
D3: Arms and shoulders (45-65mins)
JM Smith Machine Press, Rope Overhead Cable Extension or Skullcrusher/French Press Machine, Dual Cable Tricep Pushdowns
Tips: On JM Press and DCTP, angle your arms so that they are in a 30 degree angle to your torso
Machine Preacher Curl, Exernally Rotated Dual Cable Incline Curl, Rope Hammer Curl or Preacher Cable Curl
Tips: After your done with DCTP, stay there and get a bench so that you can do ERDCIC after your resting time, for preacher hammer curl some preacher machines have neutral grips, just grip those and curl away
Dumbbell or Machine Shoulder Press, Dual Cable Rear Delt Fly, Incline Dumbbell Rear Delt Row, 01 Dual Cable Lat Raise, 02 Dual Cable Lat Raise, Lat Raise Machine
Tip: for 01, place cables at about feet height, for 02 at around hip height
D4: You are skipping legs pussy
Hack or Pendulum Squat, Hack Sissy Squat, Leg Extensions
Barbell or Dumbbell RDLs, Seated Leg Curl, Lying Leg Curl
Barbell Hip Thrust or Hip Thrust Machine, Standing Calf Raise
Repeat D1, D2, D3 for 7 Day Split OR change the order of D1, D2 and D3, take a rest day after D4 and put in D1, D2 or D3 depending on the order you had before D4 for a 6 day split
Use lifting straps on D1, D3 Biceps, Triceps, Rear Delt and Lat Delt, D4 RDL, Leg Extensions, Seated Leg Curl
4.Conclusion
If you follow all of the afforementioned for 1-2 years and then do a cut you will mog.
5.Miscellaneous
Your mindset is also very important. if you keep thinking about
your progress, you will be motivated to keep going, so i recommend you take pictures. do not mentally masturbate too much however about what you might achieve. focus and hone in on the small victories.
you also want to create an enviroment in which you can succeed. surround yourself irl and online with likeminded people. make a fitness account to document your progress, seek motivation and inspire others, as well as holding yourself accountable. some people to follow are JPGCoaching, TNFCoaching, Paul Carter from LiftRunBang, TrenTwins to hype you up and Sam Sulek for good content.
- Why should you follow this routine?+Introduction
- Pre-requisites for success
- Routine
- Conclusion
- Miscellaneous
1. Why? I have yet to see a good hypertrophy split on this website. Every single one of you is coping beyond belief with your androgens, PCTs and Growth factors that you all forget how to build muscle and mog subhumans naturally without spending thousands on chemical compounds. If you follow this guide to the tee you will be able to mog a volume deepthroating SARMs goblin effortlessly, and you won't have to deal with the cost and the side effects of injecting yourself with Testosterone and GH. Obviously you CAN also be a roidtranny while'st using this guide, if you follow these steps you will mog 90% of this website, and only the genetically frame, bone and muscle blessed roidtrannies on this guide will mog you, the noble natty who made the most with what he was given. Get ready to elevate your body and mind to heights you never thought were conceivable.
2. Pre-Requisites Before you go sign up at a local gym, there are some things you need to be aware about. No doubt about it, the more you involve yourself with hypertrophy and fitness in general in real life, your online activity is going to reflect that as well. Here are some things you should look out for:
- Flashy influencer exercises: If your scrolling Instagram or TikTok, you will almost certainly eventually see some loud kid or elder teen who's trying to tell you that this super new exercise is way better for hypertrophy than anything else something along those lines. The amount of salt you need to always carry on your mental self if astronomical. ALWAYS do your own research before jumping to conclusions. Some influencer content can be helpful in finding and forming your opinion on something, but NEVER take their statement as fact BEFORE DOING YOUR OWN RESEARCH. IF PUBMED IS NOT ALWAYS POPPING UP WHEN YOU TYPE P IN SEARCHBAR, ROPE NOW!!!!
- What I just mentioned also applies to our next category: Supplements. Some you definitely should take are
Multivitamin daily
Fish Oil Omega 3 daily
Optional ones are: Pre-Workout ( Or buy the ingredients, mainly caffeine (capsules) L-citrulline, L-Arginine and add some sort of flavoing powder), whey protein powder or isolate (isolate tends to be offered in fruitier, juice-like flavors), Dextrose, EAAs (NEVER BUY BCAAs, THEY ARE THE INBRED OBJECTIVELY WORSE SUBHUMAN VARIANT OF EAAs), L-Tryptophan or Melatonin
3. Nutrition
DO NOT EXPECT TO BUILD MUSCLE IF YOU ARE EATING LIKE AN INFANT; YOU MUST BE IN A CALORIC SURPLUS TO GROW; IF YOU ARE 55KGs 'bUt mUh aBs' KILL YOURSELF NOW!!!! Now that I've hooked you dopamine fiends, let us get int the important stuff. Look up a TDEE or maintenance calorie calculator and enter what it asks of you, most likely age, height, gender, weight, activity level, exercise frequency and in some cases body fat percentage. It will caclulate how many calories you need to maintain your current weight. Take that number and add 100-150 calories on top of that. This is how much you wil be eating. Weigh yourself dail and if you see your weight stagnate for a two days or so, increase the surplus. If you want to gain weight faster, your surplus can be larger, 200-300 calories over. Personally never go over 500 calories maximum, because at that point it is most likely mostly fat you are gaining. You should eat unprocessed natural foods, like red meat, poultry, complex carbs like rice and potatoes, eggs, milk, cheese, yogurt, as well as animal fats from butter, ghee, pork fat, beef tallow. Another thing is that you should be almost constantly feeding your body nutrients, I would say three meals minimum per day. Eat before bed as well, so that the body has energy throughout the night. Pre and post workout meals are a good, thing however there's no such thing as an 'anabolic window', so don't force yourself to chug a protein shake immediately after your last intense rep for that workout. A good pre workout meal for example would be oats with protein powder, banana and honey, post workout a quick protein shake or bar and a banana and dates. Your bulk should not be shorter than 6 months, with 1 to 2 and a half years in a CONTROLLED AND CONSISTENT surplus of 100-200 calories, which will prevent you from gaining too much fat. Of course, you can bulk longer if you stay in a controlled and consistent surplus. Don't come back crying about why you look like a fat pig if you ate 2000 calories over for 5 months and don't look like Arnold.
4. Sleep: 8+ hours of restful, comfy snoozing plus good nutrition and diet equals gains. My succesfull protocol to get my sleep schedule back in order is the following: No blue light from screens at least two hours before bed, 500mg of l-Tryptophan 1 hour before bed, making my brain associate my bed with sleeping by not laying in bed during the day, also not reading in bed in the 2 hours without screens. If you are just starting this, put an alarm in the morning and jump out of bed even if you are still tired. After a few days, your body and brain will readjust your farigue and tiredness to the end of the day, because if you are tired when waking up, you'll be more tired when sleeping, thus leading to faster falling asleep and a higher chance of getting 8 hours of quality sleep.
3. Training
Now we are talking. This split can be adjusted based on how much time you have and how many days you want to train
ALL SETS ARE TAKEN TO FAILURE WITH GOOD FORM AND COMPLETE RANGE OF MOTION; SO PICK A WEIGHT WITH WHICH YOU WILL FAIL IN THE GIVEN REP RANGE; 3 MINUTES TIMED REST BETWEEN EACH SET AND EXERCISE MINIMUM!!!!! ALL EXERCISES ARE 2 SETS 5-8 REPS WITH LOADED STRETCH IN THE ECCENTRIC (STRETCHED) POSITIO COUNT TO 30 IN YOUR HEAD BEFORE LETTING THE WEIGHT DOWN SLOWLY!!!!
D1: Back (30-45min)
Wide Grip Lat Pulldown, Double D-Handle Lat Pulldown, Horizontal Neutral Grip Lat Row
T-Bar Row, Horizontal Wide Grip Row, Incline Bench Dumbbell Row
Tips: Let the bar pull your scapula up or forward for a better stretch and full ROM
D2: Chest (15-30mins)
Incline Machine or Dumbbell Press, Flat Horizontal or Vertical Press, Pec Deck
Tips: Squeeze your scapula together, keep your arms close to your torso at a 30 degree angle on pressing movements, don't arch your back on incline, humeral arm path on presses should have a large curve away from the torso on the eccentric incline angle of 30 degrees for incline press
D3: Arms and shoulders (45-65mins)
JM Smith Machine Press, Rope Overhead Cable Extension or Skullcrusher/French Press Machine, Dual Cable Tricep Pushdowns
Tips: On JM Press and DCTP, angle your arms so that they are in a 30 degree angle to your torso
Machine Preacher Curl, Exernally Rotated Dual Cable Incline Curl, Rope Hammer Curl or Preacher Cable Curl
Tips: After your done with DCTP, stay there and get a bench so that you can do ERDCIC after your resting time, for preacher hammer curl some preacher machines have neutral grips, just grip those and curl away
Dumbbell or Machine Shoulder Press, Dual Cable Rear Delt Fly, Incline Dumbbell Rear Delt Row, 01 Dual Cable Lat Raise, 02 Dual Cable Lat Raise, Lat Raise Machine
Tip: for 01, place cables at about feet height, for 02 at around hip height
D4: You are skipping legs pussy
Hack or Pendulum Squat, Hack Sissy Squat, Leg Extensions
Barbell or Dumbbell RDLs, Seated Leg Curl, Lying Leg Curl
Barbell Hip Thrust or Hip Thrust Machine, Standing Calf Raise
Repeat D1, D2, D3 for 7 Day Split OR change the order of D1, D2 and D3, take a rest day after D4 and put in D1, D2 or D3 depending on the order you had before D4 for a 6 day split
Use lifting straps on D1, D3 Biceps, Triceps, Rear Delt and Lat Delt, D4 RDL, Leg Extensions, Seated Leg Curl
4.Conclusion
If you follow all of the afforementioned for 1-2 years and then do a cut you will mog.
5.Miscellaneous
Your mindset is also very important. if you keep thinking about
your progress, you will be motivated to keep going, so i recommend you take pictures. do not mentally masturbate too much however about what you might achieve. focus and hone in on the small victories.
you also want to create an enviroment in which you can succeed. surround yourself irl and online with likeminded people. make a fitness account to document your progress, seek motivation and inspire others, as well as holding yourself accountable. some people to follow are JPGCoaching, TNFCoaching, Paul Carter from LiftRunBang, TrenTwins to hype you up and Sam Sulek for good content.
