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if you compare to people worse than you, it doesn't actually make your life any better, it just makes you a narcy when you might be average or below average, I think it's better for people to be grounded in reality, whether that reality is good or bad, otherwise they might aswell just be bluepilled or redpilled
BOTB tierWhat I am about to write in this thread is mostly water, but for some reason many of these simple things completely elude most users on looksmax.org (myself included).
Most are here to improve their looks (looksmaxxing), money (moneymaxxing) or status, which are all very fundamental cornerstones of the blackpill. These things undeniably improve your quality of life drastically. Being "NT" (neurotypical) is also something that is mentioned as a huge SMV boost here, which is also undeniably true.
However, what I will talk about here is mentality, which for many users will get mistaken for being "NT". You do not need to be NT to do these things I am about to say. Essentially you can be completely autistic and not conform to any standards of society, be introverted and not able to communicate with other people or something else that would be considered severely non-NT.
The most important thing as a man is being mentally rooted and able to draw a line between external circumstances and internal circumstances. Contrary to most blackpillers, I fundamentally do not believe the two to be correlated. Improving your mental health and the way you tackle everything that is life is vastly more important than doing everything else. Why? Because all these things (looksmaxxing, moneymaxxing etc.) all share one common goal - to feel better.
Why do all these things when you can skip directly to the crux of it? Why worry about the forward growth of your maxilla or the amount of money on your bank account, when none of that shit is the end goal but merely artificial constructs that are supposed to "get you where you want to be" (in a happier place). All these things contribute to external validation, which in turn makes you feel better. But its a giant fucking cope. Its no better than drinking a beer, smoking a joint or getting a dopamine kick from some other stupid shit. Validation is essential a drug, and it will make you weaker in the long term. Why piss your pants to keep warm?
I remember a conversation I had with @TRUE_CEL where I talked about monks in secluded cloisters. I know this is an extremity and a close to impossible thing to practice in western society where everything is so rotten. Nevertheless, the ability for positive reflection and internal validation holds immense truth. Its the only thing you can consistently practice throughout your life no matter your circumstances.
Essentially what I am talking about is changing your mindset from "it could be better" to "it could be worse".
This requires insane mental discipline and even more so depending on how dire your circumstances are when it comes to all these artificial things like money, looks, status etc. But its always possible.
The three most important things I have found that can drastically alter your perspective of life in general is practicing reframing / seeking different perspectives, being aware of your thought patterns, and limiting comparisons.
So what does this mean?
1. Reframing: Instead of seeing setbacks or difficulties as negative, try reframing them as natural occurrences. Embrace the idea that everything that surrounds you does not need negatively impact the way you view yourself. The more you do this, the more resilient you become.
2. Being aware of your thought patterns: Mindfulness can help you observe your thoughts without judgment and create space for new perspectives. By this I do not mean you have to buy some 400$ crash course from a gypsy or sit in a circle with lit candles and chant kum-ba-yah hymns. But breathing deeply for 10 minutes with your eyes closed a day with no external distractions is immensely beneficial for taking a step back and becoming aware of how your thought patterns work. And like with anything in life, thought patterns can be changed.
3. Limiting comparisons: This is the one of the most, if not THE most important things, and something that is deeply incarnate in all of us "looksmaxxers". Comparisons are the most useless thing in the world, and you almost never get anything positive from them. Its an absurd cope, because you never know how the people you are comparing yourself to truly feel on the inside. Instead channel all of that energy into things that you will make you feel better. And I am not talking about smoking a cigarette, playing your favourite game, eating some food you like or whatever. All of these useless dopamine copes do not contribute positively to your mental development. Instead, you should strive to read books (reframing your perspective), practice awareness and distance yourself from negativity.
I know this thread will probably just get laughed at. But nevertheless I believe these things to be the most vital parts of ones journey to becoming a happier man.
Which is why we are all here in the first place.
Validation is needed in order to function as a normal, healthy and mindful human being. Strip away social contact and validation from a human being, he will go mad; that's why one of the worst forms of psychological torture is complete isolation - look at prisons; also suggest reading on Hegel's Slave-Master DIALECTIC AND STOP FUCKING COPING U UTTERLESS RETARDED NIGGER!!!!!!!!
